Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
