Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Randomize