I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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