Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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