i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
