break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
