Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
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