I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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