took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Randomize
