so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
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