that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
