hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize