Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
