she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
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