In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
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