Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.

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(214): View more from Texas

The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.

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(859): View more from Kentucky

I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.

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21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Read it at the TFLN blog
(770): View more from Georgia

We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?

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(765): View more from Indiana

I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.

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(214): View more from Texas

NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.

(469): View more from Texas

BP at your house from now on.

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(407): View more from Florida

I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough

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