and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
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You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
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She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.