Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
