All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
