oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
