if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize