At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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