he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
