their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
