seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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