The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
