found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
