Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
