I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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