its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I am naked and annoyed.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
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