That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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