Sry I called you an 8
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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