are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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