At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
