i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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