she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Randomize
