Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
