If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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