also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
