she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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