I want to have your abortion
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
