I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
