Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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