you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
