Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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