piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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