bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
You dont lie about slip and slides
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
