Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
She even gives head with a lisp.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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