you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Randomize