On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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